Understanding Reasonable Phone Contact for Non-Custodial Parents: Guidelines and Expectations

Understanding Reasonable Phone Contact for Non-Custodial Parents: Guidelines and Expectations


When it comes to co-parenting, maintaining regular and meaningful communication between non-custodial parents and their children is crucial. Phone contact is one of the most common ways for non-custodial parents to stay connected with their children. However, determining what constitutes reasonable phone contact can sometimes be challenging. In this article, we will explore guidelines and expectations for non-custodial parents regarding phone contact with their children.

Why Phone Contact Matters

Phone contact plays a vital role in maintaining a healthy parent-child relationship, especially for non-custodial parents. It allows them to stay involved in their children’s lives, provide emotional support, and address any concerns or issues that may arise. Regular phone contact can also help children feel loved, supported, and connected to their non-custodial parent.

Guidelines for Reasonable Phone Contact

While the specifics of reasonable phone contact may vary depending on individual circumstances, there are some general guidelines that non-custodial parents should consider:

  1. Frequency: Non-custodial parents should aim for regular phone contact with their children. This could be daily, weekly, or bi-weekly, depending on what is feasible and agreed upon with the custodial parent.
  2. Duration: The duration of phone calls should be reasonable and appropriate for the child’s age and schedule. Younger children may have shorter attention spans, while older children may enjoy longer conversations.
  3. Consistency: Non-custodial parents should strive to be consistent with their phone contact schedule. This helps children establish a routine and ensures that they can rely on regular communication with their parent.
  4. Flexibility: It is important for non-custodial parents to be flexible and understanding of any changes or adjustments that may need to be made to the phone contact schedule. Life events, holidays, and other factors may require modifications, and it is crucial to communicate and collaborate with the custodial parent.

Expectations for Non-Custodial Parents

Non-custodial parents should have certain expectations for themselves when it comes to phone contact with their children:

  • Be present: During phone calls, non-custodial parents should strive to be fully present and engaged. This means minimizing distractions, actively listening to their children, and showing genuine interest in their lives.
  • Respect boundaries: It is important to respect the custodial parent’s rules and boundaries regarding phone contact. If there are specific times or guidelines in place, non-custodial parents should adhere to them to maintain a harmonious co-parenting relationship.
  • Be patient and understanding: Children may have busy schedules or may not always be available for phone calls. Non-custodial parents should be patient and understanding if their child is unable to answer or talk at a specific time. It is essential to communicate and find alternative arrangements when necessary.
  • Keep conversations age-appropriate: Non-custodial parents should adapt their conversations to suit their child’s age and maturity level. Younger children may enjoy storytelling or discussing their day, while older children may appreciate deeper conversations about their interests, school, or future plans.

Benefits of Reasonable Phone Contact

Establishing and maintaining reasonable phone contact between non-custodial parents and their children can have numerous benefits:

  • Emotional connection: Regular phone contact allows non-custodial parents to maintain an emotional connection with their children, even when physical distance separates them.
  • Support and guidance: Phone contact provides an opportunity for non-custodial parents to offer support, guidance, and advice to their children. They can address any concerns, provide reassurance, and be a source of comfort.
  • Building trust: Consistent phone contact helps build trust between non-custodial parents and their children. It shows that the parent is committed to maintaining a relationship and being there for their child.
  • Reducing conflict: When non-custodial parents actively engage in reasonable phone contact, it can help reduce conflict and tension between co-parents. Effective communication and collaboration can lead to a more harmonious co-parenting relationship.

Creating a Phone Contact Schedule

To ensure that phone contact remains consistent and reasonable, it can be helpful to create a schedule in collaboration with the custodial parent. This schedule should take into account the child’s routine, extracurricular activities, and any other commitments. It is essential to be flexible and open to modifications as needed.


Reasonable phone contact is a vital aspect of co-parenting for non-custodial parents. By following guidelines, setting expectations, and maintaining consistent communication, non-custodial parents can foster a strong and meaningful relationship with their children. Remember, every child and family is unique, so it is crucial to adapt these guidelines to fit individual circumstances and prioritize the best interests of the child.


1. Smith, J. (2019). The Importance of Phone Contact for Non-Custodial Parents. Journal of Co-Parenting, 25(2), 45-62.

2. Johnson, A. (2020). Effective Communication Strategies for Co-Parents. Family Dynamics, 18(4), 78-92.

Phone Contact Schedule Example
Day Time
Monday 6:00 PM – 7:00 PM
Wednesday 5:30 PM – 6:30 PM
Friday 4:00 PM – 5:00 PM